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Director: Stephen SommersRelease Date: August 7, 2009
Genre: Action / Adventure
MPAA: Rated PG-13
Paramount Pictures
The ORB's take: Nothing at all like the cartoon, just using the name to make a buck.
Movie Review:
I might be correct in saying that most of you out there probably have not seen this movie. And if this is true you may want to keep it that way, you might feel like you wasted a couple hours of your life that you want back immediately. Some of you that wanted to see this movie because as a kid you grew up watching the cartoon, and were hoping for an interesting / cool / great live depiction of what you loved as a kid. - But what you will get is you asking yourself "what is going on?" and "where did they get this from the cartoon?". The cast is pretty bad, and the script is worse. At times I had to remind myself that I am watching "G.I. Joe" and not "Power Rangers" - yes it was that bad. There is some action, and some of it is "watchable" and when I say "watchable", I mean you might want to wait for the DVD and have this film on in the background while you are doing something else somewhat productive so you don't get angry after it is over. What is actually wrong with them movie? - the cast, the acting, the script, and the idea - add that all up and you should not have made this film. This film was delayed from coming out in the spring because the test audiences didn't like it very well - I would have hated to seen the movie before they fixed it - or maybe they didn't!?! Wait for TNT to run this one and lower your expectations so you can get through the whole movie.
What to Watch For: Weapons, bad acting.
You Might If You Like These:Transformers
Street Fighter
Official G.I. Joe (2009) Site
IMDB
Director: Johanthan MostowRelease Date: September 25, 2009
Genre: SciFi / Action / Thriller
MPAA: Rated PG-13
Touchstone
The ORB's take: A promising plot doesn't deliver.
Movie Review:
This won't surprise you - "Bruce Willis" is a down on his luck cop with family problems. A role that he plays well - if you haven't seen any of the "Die Hard" films then maybe you have seen "16 Blocks" or "The Last Boy Scout" or maybe "Mercury Rising". Don't get me wrong, I believe in actors playing what they play best - but stay away from bad scripts. This is like an "iRobot" going from what was already bad to something a lot worse. The film is entertaining at times, but will remind of a film that FX or TNT could have produced. It attempts to give us twists throughout this flick, but they are so thin you can see right through them. The idea of this movie is that that most of the world operates their everyday lives through their "Surrogate" - their personal / look alike robot. They (the human) never leaves their house, and in most cases never leave their room. They control their "robot" through a machine by mind control - so since they never leave their homes, crime rates and murder rates have all been reduced toalmost zero. There is a small group of outcasts that don't believe in the "Surrogate" world and revolt against it at any cost, if the "Surrogates" enter their towns.Someone comes along and develops a weapon that can kill the human through their "Surrogate". This is what brings "Bruce Willis" out from behind his "Surrogate" to chase down this criminal the old fashion way (No Robot). This movie is not worth seeing in the theater, it would be an at best second DVD choice, and it is probably better if you'd just wait until cable ran it or a friend rented it and had you over to watch it.
What to Watch For: Plot twists
You Might If You Like These:I Robot
Minority Report
Official Surrogates (2009) Site
IMDB
Director: Ruben FleishcherRelease Date: October 2, 2009
Genre: Action / Comedy / Horror
MPAA: Rated R
Sony Pictures
The ORB's take: Woody Harrelson is hilarious and Jesse Eisenburg makes this movie.
Movie Review:
This movie really doesn't have much of an elaborate, never-seen-before plot: See Zombies! - Run from Zombies! - Kill Zombies!, but that doesn't mean that this movie is not a must see. "Zombieland" is very entertaining, combining comedy, adventure, and some horror-gore. There is one thing that sets this movie apart from some of its others in this genre - throughout the flick "Eisenburg's" character (Columbus) keeps relaying "Zombie Rules" that he lives by that keep him alive - these rules are very amusing and portrayed throughout the film. "Woody Harrelson" gives a great performance with his ruthless zombie-killing character (Tallahassee) who is always looking for a twinkie to eat but can never find one. There are only four main human characters throughout the entire movie and each are named after the destination they are headed for (each one thinks that the location they are headed is not infected by zombie disease). This movie is well done - very funny, entertaining, not too long, not too in-depth - the kind of movie you feel like you got your money's worth when you leave the theater. Enjoy!
What to Watch For: Fasten your seat belts, Twinkies, Bill Murray, and Zombies.
You Might If You Like These:Shaun Of The Dead
Official Zombieland (2009) Site
IMDB
Artist: AFILabel: Interscope
Album Type: Alternative Rock
Released: September 29, 2009
The Orb's Take: Solid album all the way through, worth a listen.
Album Review:This is AFI's seventh studio album over eighteen years of being a band. They have consistently released a new album every three years, and they put together a solid one with "Crash Love". Solid vocals, and a good mix gives us hooky lyrics with rocking guitars. Catchy choruses makes this an album worth listening to and it will have you humming them in your head. AFi has a distinct vocal sound that sets them apart from other bands. AFI would be considered as more of an "underground band" - this is a band that you will not be hearing on your local radio station getting steady air-play. Again, worth your time to check it out.
What to Listen to: "Medicate", "Torch Song", "It Was Mine"
You Might If You Like These:
My Chemical Romance
Official AFI website
AFI MySpace Page
Director: Stephen Sommers
